last night i had a dream my ex sam and i had sex. we were in the large, clean restroom of his motel room, and while his friends or fuck buddies or whatever chilled, in the room. i pulled him into the restroom and i guess i asked him about us. he didn’t respond right away so i said “alright. at least let me give you head.” and we proceeded to get naked and in the shower, which started overflowing.
i don’t know. i haven’t texted him since August, asking for the bracelet I gave him back. I haven’t had a real conversation with him since late July after my ex tried telling him all this shit. I guess I miss him. I haven’t thought about him at all because I’m afraid if I do, I’ll go crawling back to him.
He was a pretty great boyfriend. Sure, he lied to me about being in love with me, but he was great. He didn’t just want to fuck me, I went on my first date with him, he met my parents. I stopped purging when I was with him. He was good for me. But it’s over and it’s been over for almost three months and if I dwell on it too long, I’m get sad.